Some Thoughts

"Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint"
Isaiah 40:30-31

Throughout this journey, I must admit, I have grown very weary at times. At times I feel the walk is too difficult, the pain is too much, the lack of control is too frustrating. And yet the Lord is so faithful and his promises are all that I have. I have learned that if I continue to hope in the Lord and wait in the Lord then He alone will renew my spirit. Which, sounds so easy and yet is so difficult. Difficult to surrender all to Him. Surrender what I have hoped for; what I have control over; my pain; anger; frustration; selfish ambition and pride. I have learned to continue to hope in the Lord even when my prayers are not answered the way I had wanted. And now as I reflect, I rejoice because I truly feel I have come to the other side of it all and feel the strength and hope of the Lord. I have 100% peace in His calling. I was slow but I was also mourning the loss of having a family the way I just always thought it would be. But now I see the Lords plan is so much better. We have so much and have so much to offer a child of Gods. We are all Gods children and whether biological or adopted He knew us. "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart" Jeremiah 1: 5. I know God has a child set apart for us and I cannot live in fear of the "what ifs". As I reflected back today and realized how far He has brought me and prepared my heart, I can truly say I am ready to "run and not grow weary...walk and not be faint" throughout this adoption process and ultimately to bringing my child home.

I am also very excited and encouraged because I have joined an online group through my agency. It is all the families in the Russian program. It is so wonderful to be able to talk with others who are going through the same process as you. It is amazing how you can connect with families across the country and be fed by them. And it is a great resource because we are able to ask questions and get tips from others who are in it or have already been through it. We also get to share each others blogs and it is very motivating to see those who have just come home with their children! I am very thankful for this group. I do not feel alone.

.Here is a picture of the room for our child and as you can see we have laid out all the paperwork in there...it helps to keep me focused. I pray everyday for this little one. Wherever they are that the Lord protect them from all that is agianst them. That someone shows them love and attention. And that He brings them home quickly.